Yesterday, was one of those days for me. Literally, I could feel something just weighing on me all day. It started out the night before when I hit the grocery store while Jacob was in soccer. Every stinkin' sale item I was after, they were out of. Urggg...:) Then I go to pay, and well, we all know how that is nowadays: it's hard to swallow when you see those numbers keep climbing and climbing and climbing. I finally get out and load all the stuff in the car, and I'm getting ready to pull out, and this guy jumps right in front of me with his car.....so, muttering under my breath because there were 10 parking spaces closer to the store he could have gotten rather than in front of me, I backed out (yes, I know.....I'm lazy). Then yesterday hits. Jacob had probably one of the worst days in school that we have had so far with homeschooling. If you know me, you know that math is one of my least favorite subjects to do, let alone teach. And, of course, it's Jacob's most difficult. When we started school, I was emotional anyway, had a ton of stuff on my mind. As we were doing the math (and it took 2 hours yesterday, by the way), and we were shedding many tears over it, all I could think of was the negative thoughts and negative comments I've ever gotten about homeschooling.....such as, "How do you know what to teach? How do you know he's getting a good education? He needs to go to school, where he can be with other kids." And of course, my own voices inside, "You are failing; he is never going to get this unless you put him in school; you are a failure." Come on, admit it, if you're a mom, you have had these thoughts yourself, whether it be about math or discipline or whatever it may be. The emotions just kept building and building.....to the point where I finally sat Jacob down with the dictionary (with the D section, in fact, since he had made a D on his history test too:)LOL; don't worry; the one before he made a 100, so yesterday was just one of those rare, bad days; and he needed to work on spelling skills anyway).
Anyway, I reached out and emailed a fellow homeschooling friend for support....and she was wonderful enough to sit down and type out a really long email filled with encouragement and tips and experience. I can't tell you how much that lifted my spirits and just helped to take that weight off. You know what else I should have done immediately, but because I'm not perfect, I didn't do right away? I should have prayed.....Prayer is our weapon, Moms. You know what those negative voices are in your head? They are the devil's lies. Moms, be encouraged today by reading this. I hesitated to write it because I didn't want to sound all negative, but for the sake of keepin' it real and hopefully encouraging you, I am bearing my heart to you. Don't listen to those negative voices.....in fact, fight them with prayer, fight them by just taking a break to read some Scriptures, fight them by reaching out to a friend for support and encouragement. We need each other. You can do this, Moms; don't ever give up....on your kids or yourselves. If you feel that God has put you in the position of homeschooling, remember that calling, and don't give up! If you are a Mom who doesn't even homeschool, still, don't give up! We are changing the world, one tiny heart at a time. If you fail, if you lose it, if you get angry.....pick yourself back up, ask forgiveness, and move on. Believe me, I have had to ask both God and Jacob for forgiveness when I've "lost it" and yelled a few times.....I'm not perfect, and you aren't either. Nothing draws you closer to each other than to humble yourself in that way.
Don't give up, Moms! You CAN and WILL succeed!:)