Mom2Mom: Discussion: Stay at Home Mom vs. "The Working Mom"
Monday, October 19, 2009
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5 comments:
This is a difficult discussion. Mainly because I hate to offend anyone. I choose to stay home because it's all I ever dreamed of being - a stay-at-home mom. I homeschool and it's been frowned upon by my husband's family - one family member asked "What qualifies you to homeschool?" One of my husband's employees just said to me on Friday "I don't see you as the homeschooling type." What does that mean? How do I answer these things?
I don't...because at the end of the day I don't really put a lot of stock in what others truly think of me...I care about my audience of one - God. I want to please God.
So for now, for our family, we feel in the center of God's will with me home and homeschooling. When God changes our direction we will follow him no matter what others say...because we live to please one - God.
I believe that God has different wills for everyone's lives and as long as you live in the center of God's will for you life - then the noise that swirls around us about our decisions should be muted by the voice of God and where he has called you to today.
Here's my thoughts on people pleasing here:
http://womenlivingwell-courtney.blogspot.com/2008/09/are-you-people-pleaser.html
God bless!!!
Courtney
I agree, Courtney....if we actually put stock into what everyone said about us or to us, we'd be so bogged down, we wouldn't be able to function. I just am wondering how other stay at home moms answer to things like this and how they defend their positions to others, because it is something to guard.....I too am completely content to be at home, and I love it! Thanks for participating!:)
I just honestly don't worry about it. The few times someone has said something rude about me being a stay at home parent, I usually say something along the lines of "Oh, I must need to change my online banking password." When I get a quizzical look, I'll say "Since you obviously have been in our finances and know whether or not I should be home with my family, I should probably change the password." It always gets the point across.
The thing is, no one has to accept or like the choice for me to be home except me and my husband. He doesn't care as long as I'm happy - and I'm happiest being home with my kids doing the cooking/cleaning/mom thing. I don't have to defend that decision to anyone.
"Let's not forget those who do not have a choice - women who cannot rely on a rich husband." I have been shunned by the neighborhood SAHM's because all they see is that I work and they do not see me as a dedicated mom as well. I am not invited to anything!!!!!! They seem to think that a person either works or is a good mother. I CAN DO BOTH!!!!!!!!
Anonymous- I'm so sorry that you have been shunned. I have nothing but the utmost respect for moms who work outside the home. I used to work as a nurse. I really feel it's a personal decision for every family, and yes, sometimes, moms do have to work, but that doesn't mean they are bad mothers. As for having "rich husbands," I can pretty much tell you that my husband is not rich; we sometimes barely scrape by. So, that is a complete myth. It's just a personal decision we made and has to be made by each individual family. Honestly, I don't know how this topic came up because it's not what I was talking about at all on the video, but I just want to encourage you, that not all stay at home moms look at working moms as bad mothers....just be encouraged. I think it comes down to just not worrying about what others think and trudging on in what you know God wants YOU to do.....
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